Learn From My Mistakes

In the past 18 years...I've made some really stupid mistakes. Mistakes like accidentally pulling fire alarms (yes, plural), and pushing my older brother down a flight of stairs (less accidental), and being overly-honest and telling a woman at the supermarket she looked like a fat pumpkin (let me clarify that all the above example happened in my childhood. mostly.). I think about situations and conversations and I sometimes wonder, was I just a wee bit insane? The answer is yes, but so is everyone else.

As I move on to write the next chapter of my life, here is some advice from the footnotes of my own experiences that will make life a little less crazy for you.  In other words, learn from mistakes. 

•           Don’t be afraid to hold the unpopular opinion.
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•           Having fun isn't hard…when you’ve got a library card.
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•          If you want an interesting or unique signature, figure out what you want it to look like before you turn 18.
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•           Never take candy from strangers. Unless it is a Reese's peanut butter cup.
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•         Normal isn't an attainable or definable goal.
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•           Do things that scare you. Not things like getting a full-back tattoo of a dolphin or watching “The Exorcist”, but even scarier things, like introducing yourself to a stranger or standing up for prayer.
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•           If you’re in a relationship where you think the other person would die without you: get out. Unless they are hanging off a cliff, in that case they really might die.
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•           If you have a question about God, or the Bible, etc. ASK. Humbly seek truth and wisdom. It’s not a sign of unbelief, it’s a sign of spiritual growth. God will prove true every time.
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•           Bowties are cool.
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•           Try every new experience at least twice. This does not apply to murder and wearing uggs.
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•           If someone calls you weird, a nerd, or a homeschooler, try to be humble as you thank them for their compliment.
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•           It can be hard to remember sometimes when we’re teaching them to use electronics, but our parents aren't stupid, they aren't your enemies. The family you are placed in is not a mistake. Always remember that your parents want the best for you and, believe it or not, can be some of your best friends.
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•           Life is too short to wear pants around the house.
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•           Always check for loose change under vending machines, in couches, and in the pockets of your winter coats. If you really want to find some dough look in your wealthier friend’s couch and coat.
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•           Your shirt should be tight enough to show you are a woman and loose enough to show you are a lady.
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•          Everyone is just a little insane.
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•           Find out what you want and become the kind of person you’d want to meet.
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•           You can’t change people, especially not through marriage. God is the only one who can truly mold a heart.
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•           Never lower your standards, except when you’re looking for a snack and haven’t gone grocery shopping in awhile.
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•     When someone angrily asks you, "Do you think you could do this better?!" don't say yes. 
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•           You are going to make mistakes. Small potatoes like failing a test and big mistakes like failing a friend.
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•           Learn to laugh at yourself.
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•           Always bring an emergency snack.
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•          Never miss the opportunity to compliment someone.
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•          Good friends validate you, great friends vindicate you.
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•           If you’re unhappy and single, you won’t be any happier being in a relationship.
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•           If you can’t touch your toes while wearing it, you probably shouldn't wear it. If you just can’t touch your toes, that’s really sad and you should stretch more.
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•           Never trust a person who wears turtlenecks. Or, when given the choice between vanilla and chocolate, chooses vanilla.
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•           You will never regret spending a little time with God and in His word. You will regret two straight hours of Angry Birds.
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•          Fall in Love, not in Lust.
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•           If you’re having fun but really have to pee, go pee. The party will still be there when you get back.
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•           No one is perfect. Seriously. Not even Orlando Bloom. Maybe.
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•           These are not the best years of your life.
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•           When in doubt of what to say, shut up. Then you’ll at least appear to be wise.
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•     If you like it... you should put a ring on it.
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•           Have a list of adults who you can go to for advice, guidance, and prayer. No matter how wonderful your friends are, they’re in the same mess.
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•           Never send exiled Arab princes money after they sends you a pleading email. And, I’m sorry to say, you are never the 100^th site visitor who won a free ipad.
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•           Read ravenously. Biographies, science fiction, mystery, Do-It-Yourself, the back of cereal boxes; it doesn't matter. Just find what interests you and pursue it.
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•           Just because you disagree doesn't mean you can’t be friends.
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•           Always buy the cheaper, offbrand version. This does not apply to Rolexes, parachutes, or meat.
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•           Wikipedia is not God.
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•           When cheating on a test don’t write, “Answers May Vary”. Scratch that, just don’t cheat. It always come back to bite you.
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•           Tea can solve more problems than you’d think.
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•           If you deliberately hurt  yourself, or wonder if death is an escape route, or cry yourself to sleep every night; get help. You’re not ok, but you’re not alone, either.
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•           Ignore every magazine advice column you've read on what guys do or do not like and how to act accordingly. If this is the man who is going to eventually witness your snoring,  your bizarre eating habits, and plunge your toilet he’d better love you for exactly who you are, cause that’s what he is getting.
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•           When trying to make a choice, ask yourself, “Will this decision matter to me in 5 years?”
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•           Don’t advertise what isn't for sale.
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•           Never try to cut your own hair, no matter how easy the youtube tutorial looks.
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•           Anyone can tell you you’re beautiful. Look for the guy who compliments you for non-physical reasons.
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•          Save your word documents every 15 minutes.
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•           Learn how to bake. It is an essential tool to succeeding at life.You think i'm joking but i'm not. 
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•           Don’t eat your feelings.
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•      Don't Google your medical symptoms. (Bruised shin? Bloody nose? Eye twitch? Surprise!You're dying.)
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•           Travel. Anywhere, everywhere. And don’t fall asleep on strangers while taking public transport.
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•           Don’t create an email address that contains the words princess, pink, die, bubbles, fluffy, sparkle, gurl spelled with a u, or really anything else you’d be ashamed to tell a future employer.
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•          And finally, give up trying to be who other people think you should be and meeting their expectations. God is the only person you should strive to please.

- Dance it out,

     Hannah 

"The Hiding Place", aka, "The Book You Must Read NOW"

I just finished reading (and theres no denying it, sniffling) Corrie ten Boom's book "The Hiding Place". I literally began to read and didn't stop until I had turned the final page of revelations. Well, that's a lie. I did get some hot chocolate. But still.

Corrie ten Boom

If you haven't read this book, You. Need. To. Right now. After you finish reading this blog. It is simply amazing and definitely now on my list of top 5 books ever. I'm usually a person who avoids war, horror, and depression in book genres and movies but this is the exception.Yes, unspeakable things transpired in this book and it paints the bloody picture of what it was like to live in the times where Hitler is on your radio and concentration camps are an everyday horror. It also is one of the most inspiring and hope-filled books I have ever read. To live at the lowest condition of humanity and to praise God...not many people could do that.

The secret room

For me I have to say that my perspective on life has shifted from page 1 to the back cover. It really begins to put what is "unfair" in perspective. The trifling, everyday nuisances don't seem like that big of a deal. The Bible looks different, too. The Bible seems like a cheaply produced book you can find anywhere. Bookstore, libraries, even seedy motel rooms. To Corrie and the other women at her prison and concentration camp, it was priceless. To think that the same words that I might skim before I go back to reading my action adventure novel or go to bed with little thought or insight are the same words that a group of people, barely human, risked their lives to smuggle and spread? I think I'm going to put a little more thought into what I read tonight.

Jesus is Victor,

-Hannah

"Hold My Crown - I MUST BOOGEY!"

I've been reading about King David in the Bible recently, and i'm constantly amazed. (I know you just read "Bible" and your interest just evaporated, but hear me out).When you say David, everyone thinks of this little kid with a sling-shot facing off a cartoon giant. The real David of the Bible was so much more, though. If you took James Bond, Indiana Jones, and the Prince of Persia and made them into one guy born into a Bible time family then saturated him in God's favor, you'd have King David. He was strong and skilled, slaying bears and lions and real-life giants when he was just a teenager. He was specially chosen by God to rise from a Shepard (a bit like being a fast-food employee or farm hand today) and was promised the throne of Israel, a powerful and influential kingdom of the Middle East. He was a dangerous warrior is battle, an anointed musician, and a man who would die in an instant to save his friend. Not to mention that the Bible takes the time to mention how attractive and desirable (aka, pulchritudinous out the back door) David was. Bond had nothing on King David's love life, either. David seemed to collect wives and concubines that he seduced, not to mention that he had one of the Bible's most scandalous affairs (not his best moment, for sure) that involved an indiscreet bath and murder. On top of all these achievements, however, David was a dancer.

Correction, David wasn't a dancer. He danced. He could have looked like a a spinning fool on crazy flakes when he danced, but he was so filled with the joy of the Lord that he couldn't contain it all. So he danced before God and all the people of Israel in celebration. One of his wives was watching from a window and later said to him:
"How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, disrobing in the sight of the slave girls of his servants as any vulgar fellow would!"


(Aka: "How kingly you looked dancing today, David. Can't you keep a shirt on while you are gettin' jiggy? You're acting like a civillian, not royalty! You looked like a fool dancing all around.")


He shot right back at her: 
"It was before the LORD, who chose me rather than your father or anyone from his house when he appointed me ruler over the LORD's people Israel--I will celebrate before the LORD.Yes, and I am willing to look even more foolish than this, even to be humiliated in my own eyes! But those servant girls you mentioned will indeed think I am distinguished!"


(Aka: "Yo, wife! There was no shame because my dancing was for God. Anyway, God chose me, NOT your father the last king, to rule over Israel. I will celebrate and thank God for what he has done for me. I would embarrass myself so much even I thought I looked ridiculous if it was for God. Oh, and those servant girls in the crowd watching me? They will only think I am being kingly! True story."

(By the way, his wife ended up being cursed never to have children to the day of her death. Better think twice before despising God's people.)




"So great," you're thinking. "He was filled with great joy and danced with no shame before the Lord. Great guy, good for him, time to go check Facebook." But there is more. Anyone can worship God with a thankful heart when life is going well, blessing and favor being showered, a new iphone 4 in their pocket. But what about when your To Do list is longer than your day? What about when you are depressed, an emotional wreck? When you don't have the new car you want and you just wrecked the junker you do have?

David faced one of the hardest times of his life shortly after his adulterous affair with Bathsheba, a military friend's wife. 9 months, to be exact. His newest wife was pregnant. However, in punishment for King David's sin, God told him that his son would die. David's confidant and cocky additude suddenly deflated. In utter misery and grovelling desperation, he tore his kingly robes and refused to eat, pleading with the Lord for his son's life. This is what happened:


"And they said, “He (David's son) is dead.” 

To someone who isn't a christian, stumbling on this story without looking at the rest of the Bible, they must think that God is a heartless, cosmic dictator. Nothing could be farther from the truth. God had to punish David, like a parent taking away a toy that their child had stolen, but it was perhaps harder for God than it was David. No father enjoys seeing their kid in pain, but sometimes the right thing to do isn't the easy thing to do. How easy would it have been for God to just allow David to live happily ever after, no side-affects after committing adultery and murder. But it wouldn't have been right, it wouldn't be the best thing for David. It can be so hard to understand from our point of view, but God was only doing what was best for David, like any good parent would. 

Never think that God didn't care about David, though. God did. The price of sin is death, and since no one is perfect we all are sentenced to death, no matter how many good things we do. God loved David, you, and me so much that he gave his own perfect son to die so that we could live. Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice.


Right, back to King David.


"And they said, “He (David's son) is dead.” So David arose from the ground, washed, anointed himself, and changed his clothes; and he came into the house of the LORD and worshiped."

Wow. When I first read this I did a double-take. If you've ever lost a child, a sibling, or a family member you know what it feels like. Shock, disbelief, confusion; the feeling like someone has unceremoniously ripped your heart out of your chest and all that remains is a hollow place where all the memories and love of that person are supposed to be but never will. "How it feels when the sacred is torn from life, and you survive." The death of a loved one, especially a child, is an event that can destroy a family. It took months, more, for my family to return to a semblance of normal life after my baby brother died (another story for another time). So how, HOW, can David worship and dance before the Lord when his newborn son just died? Not to mention when David knows that it is all his fault?


Because David knew why God had taken his son, he knew God did it because he loved David more than the King could understand. He still knew, beyond the pain he felt, that God had saved his life and had made a way that despite David's sin he would see his son again one day. He knew that God is indescribable and worthy to be praised.


So he danced. I doubt that the same joy filled him, i'm sure he felt like a piece of dirt that had gone into the wash and became a shred of beaten lint. Not to mention he hadn't ate, washed, or slept for who knows how long. And yet he worshiped. David had enough wisdom to know that worship isn't just praising God when everything is thanksgiving and blessing, its about learning to dance in the rain.

So that is also why I dance. I'm no prima ballerina and i'll never be able to do a perfect grand je'te, but I will always strive to dance like King David. Unashamed, in love, with a heart of worship. Plus, have you heard me sing?

(Here is an incredibly subtle hint...)

There is always a story,
_Hannah


(P.S. Started writing this as my 20 minute blog post about why I dance, idea from Brianna's lovely blog. Here I am, two hours and some pretty heavy writing later...)

YOU GOIN' DOWN, JIMINEY!

Tonight, Jiminey Cricket dies.

Well, not the actual animated Disney character from Pinocchio (though he was mighty annoying as well). No. This time it's his all-to-real cousin, the cricket who lives in our basement. Specifically, in my bedroom.

It was about 11:20 and i'd just gotten home from a long run. Exhausted, short-changed on sleep, and with a lot to do the next day, i collapsed into bed. I was just drifting off to sleep when a cricket with a megaphone from somewhere in my room yelled, "Hey Baby! You looking fiiiiinnnnneeee tonight, yeah. I'm here, what are your other two wishes? I've never seen an angel without wings before. Yeah, you like that baby?"

(This gif hypnotizes me...)

Obviously the cricket wasn't actually talking to me, but I took the liberty of translating its booming, disruptive mating calls he sounded off. Every few minutes. ALL. NIGHT. LONG. Do you know how hard it is to sleep with someone yelling cheesy pick-up lines at you all night in cricket? Very. And thats why i'm training to become a ninja cricket assasin: bringing sleep to humans everywhere.

Tonight, when the sun goes down and the crickets come out, that crickets going down. I am going to pin-point his location, prepare myself with a hefty math book (Really, what else are they good for?) and assassinate that cheeky little monkey.MWAAHHAHAhhahaHHAHHAHAAA!

(...I wonder how biblical and morally upstanding it is to be planning murder on a Sunday morning before leaving for church? Oh, well. Maybe God will smite the cricket before I get home with a lightening bolt or an avenging angel and do the job for me.)

 Cricket Intent,
-Hannah Hoo
(p.s. sorry for the blue, slight glitch)

Men in Dresses: The Easter Addition

 It's that time of year again. Men dig out their moth-eaten robes and grow out their beards, moms organize carpooling, and children are forced to frolic around in scrappy dresses. You guessed it. It's Easter. 

On Good Friday, Average Saturday (my official name for the ignored day between Friday and Easter), and Easter Sunday, churches countrywide re-enact the Resurrection Story and share the good news with the world. Oh, and unofficially compete with other churches to become the best Easter performance in the local tri-state area. For the few days before, during, and after each church's performance are ironicly hellish. 24-7 church members are running about and trying to make their performance as flawless as possible for the big day(s). 

  Not all is stress and rush, however. Church members have a variety of roles to choose from. Here are the classics:

A Townspeople

This is the simplest of the lot. All you do is wear a bathrobe and fasten a dishcloth to your head with a scrap of fabric. Voila! You are a townsperson. The role requires you to have some serious mental issues, including but not limited to bi-polar disorders, restless feet syndrome, and multiple personalities. You will dance the grapevine repeatedly, enthusiastically praise the coming of the messiah, oooo and aaaaahhhh at everything, and then spit insults at the people being crucified.

A Disciple

Ah, one of the chosen followers. You don't have to do too much. You attend feasts with Jesus, fall asleep when you aren't supposed to, and run around graveyards looking for the risen King of Kings. Their are a few particular disciple roles, however. You could be Peter, the man who denied Jesus 3 times and had thing about fowl. Or Judas, the one who betrayed Jesus for some dough and was mentioned as being a bad kisser. That, or you will probably end up being the poor man who is forced to wear a bubblegum-colored robe. It doesn't matter what caliber a thespian you are, everyone will remember you as "that guy in a pink dress". 

A Demon

Your lines consist of "Hssssssss," "Rasssppppp," and occasional screams of fear/terror/pain. You will be given a black unisex, one-size-fits-all robe and hood that isn't particularly attractive. Black facepaint (red if you're fashion forward) will probably be smeared on your face. This is a physically taxing role. To look demonic you must follow these simple instructions:

1.Apply costume. 

2.Cackle and hiss like a clogged drain. 

3.Pretend you are a T-Rex with itty-bitty arms. 

4.Go down in a squat then spasm and groan like you pulled a muscle in your back. Make that several muscles.

5.Dart side to side, while still crouching, just as if someone was throwing fruit at you and you are trying to avoid it.

6.Run towards the Devil onstage like he's the last donut in the box. Suddenly develop a limp.

7.You are a demon!

An Angel

Being an angel is just a combination of imitating my brother and wearing white before Labor Day; It requires being around or over 6ft. and never showing emotion on your face. You will be the quiet, strong warrior that doesn't lash out at the little demon's taunting but instead will stand and take it. Like a man. In a white dress. With flowing sleeves. 

A Lunatic

If you can act as if you were stung by bees, hadn't taken a bath in a year, and were fleeing for your life all at once than you, yes you, can be a demon-possessed person. Bonus points if you have a pet pig.

A Pharisee

You are the "Bad Guy". You capture Jesus, crucify him, and wear rugs over your dresses. Oh, and you have to cackle in melo-dramatic mad scientist laughter repeatedly. 

The Devil

Nobody want to get this role. You either dress as the grim reaper or a businessman. You will be given a monoluge and are the newest spokesperson for cough drops. You also have to do the cliche bad guy laugh. Like, a lot. Pretty much every time anything remotely sinister happens. 

Jesus

Oh, so you're THAT guy. Every time the church puts on a production that requires a Jesus role, they call you. Your nickname is Lil' Jeez. You have long hair and an full beard year round. Instead of swimsuit season you hit the treadmill to prepare for Easter Season when you will parade before the entire church in a biblical depends. On the plus side, your role is the Son of God, you perform miracles galore, and you come back from the dead. Sweet.

While there are several other roles to be filled in an Easter Performance, these were the highlights for me. For better or for cheesiest, I did have a few issues about some of the performances I saw this year. One was the lack of historical accuracy. In one of the shows we saw there was only Jesus on the cross, they completely cut out the other 2 sinners. At another performance I noticed that the eye candy that had been promised paradise last year was replaced by a pot-bellied man who was struggling to keep his dentures in. (Just to be clear, that complaint had nothing to do with historical innacuracy. Unless the Bible says something different if you look back in the original Hebrew.)

In closing, i'd just like to say I mean no disrespect to God or the resilient people who perform the legendary tale. I fully and whole-heartily believe the Easter story and that Jesus really was the Son of God and rose again after 3 days. One of the reasons why I find it easy to poke fun of the performances is because i've participated in them, have friends in them, and have seen hundreds. The story of Easter and why we celebrate it is important and makes people remember what we tend to ignore the rest of the year. But really, no matter how serious the subject matter, who can't crack a smile when they see their pastor in a manly little blue number?

May All Your Bunnies Be Chocolate,

-Hannah Hoo

Worship?

(I really like this picture. To me this says worship. Just look at their faces! They look so moved...)
The question on my mind today:

"What is Worship?"

The Dictionary says:

–noun

1.

reverent honor and homage paid to god or a sacredpersonage, or to any object regarded as sacred.

2.

formal or ceremonious rendering of such honor and homage:They attended worship this morning.

3.

adoring reverence or regard: excessive worship of businesssuccess.

4.

the object of adoring reverence or regard.

Or,

a feeling of profound love and admiration

Almost two years ago now I choreographed and performed a worship dance for my church to the song "My Redeemer Lives". My mom and I began preparing more songs with other women from my church, about one dance a month. On Sunday mornings I dance in the front and a little to the side of the congregation while my mom pushes a handicapped boy named Jesse in his wheelchair.

Dancing on during Sunday worship service was a struggle for me, still is. The idea of dancing from the heart, not thinking it out and choreographing it first, intimidated me. I've always been a people pleaser, so truly letting go and dancing while an entire congregation of people watched me? Terrifying. Still, I dance.

For several months now, I've felt so awkward and uncomfortable dancing. When I examine my heart attitude and reasons for dancing, they aren't what I'd hoped for. When I was forming my first dance, it wasn't because I expected to perform it for my church. It was because I felt moved to dance for God, I wanted to seek him and glorify him through song and movement. I wanted to worship him, alone in my basement. My heart was in the right place.

The reason why I dance for my church, I've come to see, wasn't as much to please God as it was to please my mom. I wanted to meet her expectations, make her proud by dancing during church. I said it was for God, yet now I question if that was(is) my truest motivation?

So what do I do? Do I stop dancing, take a break to meditate on God and try to return to the true heart of worship?

Am I truly worshiping?

Confused,

~Hannah Hoo